For our n00bs - how Jalop is your vehicle?

"Slave2anMG" (Slave2anMG)
09/06/2013 at 16:42 • Filed to: Jalopometer

!!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!!

edit - 175 points for a '72 MG Midget. Crashbox non synchro first gear, twin carbs, no cupholder, made in Britain. !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!! Should award more points for Lucas electrics, Lockheed hydraulics, and still having points/condenser ignition...

DISCUSSION (45)

AbigGRNboot > Slave2anMG
09/06/2013 at 16:46

Kinja'd!!!

My poor old Pontiac. :-(

Tom McParland > Slave2anMG
09/06/2013 at 16:46

This is awesome...I am so putting it in my "Welcome Post"

PRBot II > Slave2anMG
09/06/2013 at 16:48

SAAB 9-3: Score 70.

Chairman Kaga > Slave2anMG
09/06/2013 at 16:48

CR-V = -154

GTV6 = 168

Party-vi > Slave2anMG
09/06/2013 at 16:49

I miss this!

E46 330Ci: 115. Not bad.

CJ3A: 220. Sweet.

Xesty > Slave2anMG
09/06/2013 at 16:49

Only 31 points but hey... it was free (although under sad circumstances)!

pdthedeuce > Slave2anMG
09/06/2013 at 16:50

my DD Blazer = 18

my project Mustang = 75

LuczOr > Slave2anMG
09/06/2013 at 16:51

I scored 76, but I think I was jipped because my 86 4runner is technically an SUV. It comes with no amenities and impossible rear seat access if you're not a gymnast. But I don't think I got enough points for my removable hardtop. I also got jipped because the 4 banger is completely gutless. My truck rolls out to a 76, but it has 150+ spirit.

505Turbeaux > Slave2anMG
09/06/2013 at 16:54

Roadmaster wagon got me a 215! Sweet

Dogapult > Slave2anMG
09/06/2013 at 16:55

1963 Beetle: 185
1973 Toyota Celica: 171
2006 Infiniti G35: 94
We really need to update it with more stuff. who runs the web site for it?

Blathering Seagulls > Slave2anMG
09/06/2013 at 16:56

Current: 2013 BMW 128i (6MT) - 130 points!

Former: 1998 Volvo V70 GLT - 42 points... But I thought we loved turbo Volvo wagons?

Former: 2003 Honda Civic Hybrid (5MT) - 36 points.

Fed(oo=[][]=oo)uken > Slave2anMG
09/06/2013 at 17:02

This is fun :) 175! Wooo!

...too bad I sold it and am carless. Sad trombone.

Makoyouidiot > Slave2anMG
09/06/2013 at 17:02

Damn. Both my cars score 46-75. Odd that a Dart and a Mazdaspeed Protege are only separated by the age on the jalopometer.

PRBot II > Slave2anMG
09/06/2013 at 17:04

Not sure what I just made here, but I think it might be badass.

Kinja'd!!!

Sparf > Slave2anMG
09/06/2013 at 17:06

Oh come on, did it seriously think I drive a Camry?

Also, the '88 ST165 Celica GT-Four deserves more than 71! How the hell can having an ashtray subtract 5 points?

EDIT: 150 for a Hot Rod seems a tad bit low, but not bad.

Arch Duke Maxyenko, Shit Talk Extraordinaire > Slave2anMG
09/06/2013 at 17:06

1996 BMW 328i=130

1976 Pinto Wagon=130

Uhm is this rigged?

TheBloody, Oppositelock lives on in our shitposts. > Slave2anMG
09/06/2013 at 17:09

2004 Discovery 100

76-100 points: 'Vettes get 'em wet, dude. As do turbo-diesel Peugeot wagons.

NaturallyAspirated > Slave2anMG
09/06/2013 at 17:14

'98 Subaru Legacy: 41

'90 Miata: 131

'98 v6 Mustang: 133

I think this thing might be broken.

NaturallyAspirated > NaturallyAspirated
09/06/2013 at 17:17

'74 Dodge Dart 4-door with a slant 6 and 3-speed auto: 110

'95 Ford Taurus SHO: 23

I rest my case.

SteyrTMP > Slave2anMG
09/06/2013 at 17:21

Huh. I got 400 points, but for some reason, I don't think a Locost was thought of when this survey was made....

ddavidn > Slave2anMG
09/06/2013 at 17:34

Er, E36 M3... but close!

Kinja'd!!!

Edit: obviously by close I mean relative to the entire world of cars. Not that my car compares to an E39 M5.

HammerheadFistpunch > Slave2anMG
09/06/2013 at 17:41

96 points, I can live with that.

Kinja'd!!!

But it does make me wonder how a diesel manual wagon gets -15 points....

whateverkinjasucksbad > Slave2anMG
09/06/2013 at 17:47

89 s 10 - 105 points wtf?

Dakotacowboy > Slave2anMG
09/06/2013 at 17:54

'96 Dodge Dakota V6 Auto 2wd: 133

'96 Dodge Neon coupe with a manual: 70

It seems fair given the Jalop love of horsepower and rear wheel drive. I was surprised that my recently repaired rusty wheel well netted me 20 extra points though.

Your boy, BJR > Slave2anMG
09/06/2013 at 17:56

'73 Bimmer- 115

'12 Sonata 6MT- 5

'02 Viggen 5-door- 65

Fair enough.

Chris Clarke > Slave2anMG
09/06/2013 at 17:57

2001 Audi s4: 110

Not too bad. Needs wagon body style option.

lonestranger > Slave2anMG
09/06/2013 at 17:58

'04 Sierra - 125. Only negative points were for having two cupholders and only one ashtray.

Kinja'd!!!

Sn210 > Slave2anMG
09/06/2013 at 18:07

'08 civic = 86 points

HammerheadFistpunch > HammerheadFistpunch
09/06/2013 at 18:08

excuse me, -25 points. Seriously, how is a jetta sportwagen tdi 6 speed manual not a jalop car?

Leadbull > Slave2anMG
09/06/2013 at 18:13

Haven't don't this in a while!

2006 Hyundai Tucson: -85 :(

Would be -105 if it was auto.

Michael Delaney reaches down between his legs and eases the seat back > Sparf
09/06/2013 at 18:14

IIRC ashtrays are supposed to add points. Cupholders subtract points.

This was originally a Jonny Lieberman article, way back when.

Sparf > Michael Delaney reaches down between his legs and eases the seat back
09/06/2013 at 18:31

Yeah I realized my mistake after the editing window had passed.

Are two near-useless cupholders integrated into the box between the seats (my otherwise great English vocabulary fails me here, what's the name of it?) in a way that is very similar to a toilet seat really worth subtracting points for?

Michael Delaney reaches down between his legs and eases the seat back > Sparf
09/06/2013 at 18:37

Your English is fantastic, especially in the face of my non-existent Swedish. The word you're looking for is "console."

As for the cupholders, you are planning to remove them, right? *wink, nudge* They're useless, so you plan to take them out. Voila, no cupholders.

Sparf > Michael Delaney reaches down between his legs and eases the seat back
09/06/2013 at 18:46

Thank you, although if it makes you feel any better about your monolingualism I can tell you that it's actively screwing with my Swedish grammar and vocabulary, which is a bit awkward at times.

I would remove those cup holders, but I'm afraid it might ruin the cars current interior state of near-mintness. I just decided today that I'm not going to mod the car more than I need to make it run well, and that I'll instead save my money so I can buy an RWD track car to go nuts with. Right now I'm still set on getting an '85 RX-7 GSL-SE a la my earlier post .

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Jeremy Bloyd-Peshkin > Slave2anMG
09/06/2013 at 18:49

180 for my hella ghetto e28. Not too shabby.

Michael Delaney reaches down between his legs and eases the seat back > Sparf
09/06/2013 at 18:52

Good friend of mine is Norwegian and he runs into the same problem now and again. Not too often because he's been in the States for so long, but he dishes some weirdness when he gets tired and brain slips between languages.

I hear you on mintness. Was more just joking around for the sake of your Jalopmeter score. Great call on the Gen1 RX7. My friend's dad had one as a track car when we were growing up, although it had been SBC-swapped with Muncie Rockcrusher behind it. Vicious little car.

Sparf > Michael Delaney reaches down between his legs and eases the seat back
09/06/2013 at 19:20

he dishes some weirdness when he gets tired and brain slips between languages.

This is my problem all the time , (although it's fine most of the time since Swedes speak Swenglish all the time) since I keep going to bed late and waking up late (or going to bed semi-late and waking up early in case I've got a lecture or seminar that day) and therefore am always in a state of what my mom likes to call "having an overheated brain". I'm trying to get things back to normal, but I've grown too accustomed to being a night owl. I guess it did come in handy when I had to pick up my dad sometime past 1 AM last week. He was slightly tipsy (company party) and tired as hell, but I felt sharp as a knife, which is nice when driving at night.

As much as I roll my eyes at V8-swapped RX-7s, that sounds like a nice car! I must say that if you have to V8-swap an RX-7, the SA/FB really is the one where it makes the most sense. The reason for that is that it has an SRA, and overall it feels to me like it was designed for the US market even more than the Datsun Z it was supposed to compete with.

Firewrx234 > Slave2anMG
09/06/2013 at 19:59

1999 Pontiac GTP 2 door - 23 points :/

Michael Delaney reaches down between his legs and eases the seat back > Sparf
09/06/2013 at 20:17

Yeah, English is kind of infiltrating everywhere because we export so much "entertainment." I find it takes me about a week or so of concerted effort to switch sleeping habits. I always scheduled late classes so I was a night-owl in college too.

I'm going to get a little hipster here, but this swap was done after the rotary blew its apex seals and just generally proved to be really bad at the track...in 1987. So this is well before the swap for the sake a swap craze started. It was just a little car with good handling that needed an engine, certainly not a classic. Just a fun car with an empty bay!

I always put the RX7 in a different bucket than the Zs b/c of the rotary. As much as the SRA fit that ponycar ethos, and makes it a good candidate for a swap, as you say, they were strange little outliers. I was always a much bigger fan of the Zs.

If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent > PRBot II
09/06/2013 at 21:11

You drive a Vector, don't you

PRBot II > Slave2anMG
09/06/2013 at 21:24

Me: My car has ultra-high performance summer tires, does that count for anything?

Test:

Me: What about the modifications I did?

Test:

Me: I take really good care of it. It's clean, shiny, even smells good.

Test:

Me: The car has 263,000 miles on it and it runs great ffs!

Test:

Me: I have two cup holders.

Test: Minus 20 points.

PRBot II > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent
09/06/2013 at 21:26

lol

Fed(oo=[][]=oo)uken > Fed(oo=[][]=oo)uken
09/07/2013 at 09:33

This was for a well bondo'd, well driven '86 528e auto.

Fed(oo=[][]=oo)uken > Fed(oo=[][]=oo)uken
09/07/2013 at 09:36

I would also like to ad that if you configure this for any older SUV, you lose points for a removable hard top??? Perhaps amend to give points for Scout/Bronco/Blazer/Ramcharger, etc?

davesaddiction @ opposite-lock.com > Slave2anMG
09/15/2020 at 10:02

Do you own this? Can you update it?

https://oppositelock.kinja.com/how-oppo-is-your-car-2020-edition-1845055361